Honesty In Worship

What Makes You Worship?

The statement made by one of my favorite worship leaders, David Binion, was that Worship is simply love responding to love. As soon as he said it my heart was quickened to understand why we have such a hard time in worship.

If worship is simply love responding to love, what happens when you don’t know how to receive love nor give love?

My truth is:  I have a hard time trusting and I have a hard time receiving love.

Love makes me uncomfortable… its makes me cringe with embarrassment,excitement and euphoria all at the same time. Love causes me to trust, causes me to stop, causes me to exist. All my life, and our lives as humans we’ve been surrounded by conditional love. Surrounded by love that says give me 1 and I’ll bring 1 and then we’ll have 2. And if you take away your 1, I’ll take away my 1 and we’ll have no more love.

God’s love takes the first step, and stays there continually.

So this is Story of a broken worshiper pt. 2

Brokenness is the one of the most important things in our worship. I firmly believe that. In the most shattering places of my life, Earth shaking revelations, and simplistic times of a contrite and broken heart, when I worshiped, He ( God) moved.

He moved in my heart, my mind, my soul, my trust, and begun to heal. Unfortunatly, in our culture today, brokeness in worship isn’t very popular. Maybe the word Broken makes you cringe as it made me cringe at one time, so lets replace it:

How about Honesty in Worship?

I cannot tell you how many times, including this morning, I went before the Lord in our time of coorparate worship with a mask on, with a facade of “I’m ok” or “I don’t need you”. I’m just being honest here. But see in God’s word it was made plain to us that He would no longer accept nor seek the worship from our father’s mountain, from those wells they so easily dug, but he seeks the truth of us. The truth of our worship, our need, our desire for him!

“Believe me, woman, the time is coming when you Samaritans will worship the Father neither here at this mountain nor there in Jerusalem. You worship guessing in the dark; we Jews worship in the clear light of day. God’s way of salvation is made available through the Jews. But the time is coming—it has, in fact, come—when what you’re called will not matter and where you go to worship will not matter – It’s who you are and the way you live that count before God. Your worship must engage your spirit in the pursuit of truth. That’s the kind of people the Father is out looking for: those who are simply and honestly themselves before him in their worship. God is sheer being itself—Spirit. Those who worship him must do it out of their very being, their spirits, their true selves, in adoration.” – John 4:21-24

I count myself thankful to have experienced those situations listed in Pt. 1 of this blog. Thankful because it reduced me back to honesty. See that verse  24 says , ” God is spirit, and his worshipers must worship in spirit and in truth.”  What that says to me, is exactly what was said in the Psalms, that Deep calls to  deep in the roar of the waters, let all the waves and breakers wash over me. Then let Him, God, sing His song over me.

So my worship, my broken worship, must be my Deep, my heartbreak, my anger, my offended/disappointed heart reaching for His, God’s, heart. When I come before God honestly, broken, there’s an exchange that happens, a signal of trust.

Brokeness compells our walls to be brought tumbling down because the reality of our need overshadows the anchors of our pride.

Brokenness is the  anchor of trust.

For one to be broken with another, you must be able to trust. What we’ve failed to truely understand in the body of christ is that our brokenness to and with God is an anchor of what He can trust us with.  We hit a  plateau of what we know as success and happiness when we must be crushed to abosolute trust in the truth of God.

Thats where I am and where I’ve been for the last year almost.

I’ve been joyous, I’ve had ministry triumphs and financial ones, relational success, and everything in the world looking up and up! Then brokenness was called unto me.

Here’s the beautiful truth in this life, my willingness to be broken crushes every possibility of me turning into Saul or Absolom. Saul’s issue was the brokeness & humility knocking on his door was turned into bitterness and rage oppossed to  humble tenderness.

Humble… Tender…. Meek

Those words to some exude weakness, but to me they  shout strength.

Humble – is one who knows who they are , but bows to serve anyone no matter the other’s status

Tender – is a move that is gentle when you were made to crush

Meek – well they are the ones with huge power, but thy have it under contol.

I compell you dear one, run wildly into the wilderness and be broken with your beloved!

Matthew 5

Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Psalm 42:7

Chaos calls to chaos,
to the tune of whitewater rapids.
Your breaking surf, your thundering breakers
crash and crush me.
Then God promises to love me all day,
sing songs all through the night!
My life is God’s prayer.